They welcome you to their group. You enter, shy at first, head down, biting your lips nervously. Their eyes study you , their lips slowly curling to a smile. You’re their new doll. One of them throws a joke, cracking the ice, breaking it into tiny transparent specks that brighten the room up . You laugh, they laugh with you. Something in their eyes captures your attention , but you can’t interpret what it is. Hmm , wickedness , maybe? Evilness ? But no, it can’t be. These people are different. They’re good. You let it go; you got accepted, finally, and you wont waste this chance because of some made up hallucinations. You start hanging out with them, having fun , going wild. A weekend is never spent at home, summer never alone. You might get tired, or broke, but no, that doesn’t matter. You need to keep going. You need to stick around. You finally got accepted and you can’t afford to wreck it. You struggle to keep up, and that’s okay. It’s fine, you tell yourself, it’s all worth it. They’re your friends, you can’t let them down.

Gradually though, so slowly that you barely notice it as it occurs, you change. Your head, it rises up bit by bit. Your confidence, it grows little by little. You don’t notice it, but they do. Their eyes are trained to detect it, for they know that a time will come when it’ll happen, and they know what to do, how to destroy it. They retreat, slowly fading away. You try to hold onto them, but they manage to slip.You run after them, but they’re too fast. You keep running in circles, never able to corner them , always a step behind. They’re crushing you, gradually, slowly,it’s working. And one day, you wake up, and it hits you. Once again, you realize you’re alone , a lonely sad creature back to the start. Your soul gives a howl, one drowned by the night,and you’re left there on the cold hard ground to slowly rot and descend to hell. 



I once saw this piece of writing and liked it since. It opened my eyes on many things :

“Go lay on the grass in a quiet place…

Take a few deep breaths, relax, and stare up at the sky for a few minutes.

Now realize that you are stuck to a massive rock 8,000 miles wide… hurtling through space at 70,000 mph… around a gigantic ball of fire burning at 9,941 degrees F(5,550 C) …through a Universe that has no beginning or end.”

It really shows how big and fascinating everything in this universe is. Realize that the stars you look at have been there for billions of years, and that the light they emit sometimes takes thousands of years (and more) to reach the Earth. Realize that the Earth had been roamed by many creatures we have never seen and possibly some we have no knowledge of yet. Realize that since  the beginning of life on Earth, there has always been day and night, in a consistent pattern day after day. Realize that yesterday and tomorrow don’t exist and that your entire existence has been one long second – an eternal present moment. Realize that your birthday also represents the number of times you’ve gone around the sun. Realize that your body hasn’t stopped functioning since the day you were born, and will continue non-stop till the day you die. Consider that you can see less than 1% of the electromagnetic spectrum and hear less than 1% of the acoustic spectrum, and that there are colors the human eye can’t see and the brain can’t imagine. Realize that we never really know what we think we know and that life is one hell of a mystery still waiting to be unraveled .